Not Enough Time

I had a pretty productive afternoon today.  I arranged the classroom furniture, reorganized a storage cabinet, hung posters on the walls, prepared student journals, and pondered course curriculum.  After a late dinner this evening, I persevered through final changes to my course syllabus.  It was the most productive day I've had so far in this getting-ready-for-school process.  You'd think that, by my fifth first day of school, I'd feel a little bit more prepared to meet my new students and launch into a new year of learning.

I thought so, too.

For some reason, I find myself scrambling, hoping that somehow the loose ends will be pulled together in time.  Don't get me wrong, I am very excited to welcome the new sixth graders into my English classroom and embrace my new role as Literacy Coach!  It's just that I wish I could have more time to reflect, discuss, and plan.

I know I'm not alone.  Many of my conversations with colleagues this morning affirmed that the school year is coming too quickly for us to complete all that we set out to accomplish.

Yet, in these chaotic moments, I hear God's whispers of truth.  There are always lessons to be learned amidst challenge, so I'm choosing to keep my eyes open so I don't miss them.

There will never be enough time.  For the high-standard, want-it-to-be-perfect type like me, there will always be something else to add to make it better.  I could have three more weeks instead of three more days, and I'd find a way to fill each waking hour.  I must learn to use my time wisely and then rest in the end result.  It might not be perfect, but it's the best that I can offer.  And I offer it with arms outstretched, fully acknowledging my weaknesses, giving my very self as a living sacrifice.  Lord, may I continue to humbly rely on You, my sovereign Provider.

I must choose to make enough time for what matters.  It would be easy to say that there is simply not enough time to do anything else right now but get ready for school.  This would be more than a missed opportunity; it would be a mistaken priority.  I spent time yesterday preparing for and leading a worship team rehearsal.  This weekend, I'll celebrate my roommate's 25th birthday and honor Sunday as my weekly Sabbath.  Neither of these fits nicely into my schedule, but I wouldn't think of missing these moments.  Father, continue to guide my perspective so that my choices reflect Your heart.

So, I'm choosing to let go of having all the bulletin boards finished and all the books on the shelves.  My Pinterest boards will have to wait.  Instead, I'll spend time considering how to promote community in our school, readying myself to reteach routines, and praying for my students.  I want to enter this week - my last first week of school at BFA, at least for now - with an eternal perspective and eyes that see what really matters.  It's all for Him.  I can't ever afford to forget that.

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:14